I’m not even that incredibly sad that the Ponds went back into the past…
I’m not heartless… here is just something personal if you want to read it.
Don’t get me wrong it’s heartbreaking, for us and the doctor.
But that’s not what destroyed me, what destroys me is that Amy has grown up too.
It’s horrible for the Doctor in a way to know he’s not needed any more, but this isn’t about the Doctor. This is about me.
Amy has been on Doctor Who for two and a half years, and I have gone through the most serious, challenging, heartbreaking and hurtful things in the last two and a half years of my life. I cried when Amy left, the sadness of the moment, the horribleness of Amy leaving the doctor just like that.
But I’m sadder now that I’ve realised why the last half season has tugged at me so much. Amy has spent the last two and half years learning lessons, having her heart broken and growing up. And it is just now that I realise that I’ve grown up too.
I’ve gone through dark and lonely times, I’ve felt desperate, and betrayed, and I’ve waited. Waited so much. And like Amy I’ve lost things, but I’ve also filled parts of my life that have always felt empty.
And now I feel like maybe I’ve grown up enough to leave some of my safety blankets and imaginary friends behind. Just like Amy.
That’s why I’m sad and a little hopeful. Goodbye Amy.